Only when I believe, I can achieve.
As I take myself back a year and a half, to when I was walking on the streets of this city with no hope of the world in my heart, a glimpse of sad days passes in front of my eyes like a movie.
A year and a half ago, on a day like this, I was walking the streets from university to home. That day wasn’t a normal day or a normal walk.
While walking, I felt I was carrying troubles of the whole world on my shoulders. My steps were too weak, my hands shivering and I was stumbling.
Looking at the road of my life ahead, it appeared empty. Nothing was clear, even the future was vague and frightening. I was helpless.
I walked a mile and that’s when I saw an old man seated on the side of the road, gardening the streets like an artist sketching his own future with a joyful smile on his face. I wished I was in his place doing exactly what he was doing; perhaps living my life among flowers would make it a bit exciting, I thought.
I wished to be anywhere and anyone that day, other than where and who I was.
I carried in my heart broken dreams and unfulfilled wishes.
However, I kept walking.
I arrived home, safe and secure. After hours of thinking, I decided to make a choice.
I wrote two of my dreams on a piece of paper and buried them under a rock close to my home, promising that I would not go back to them until the day I turned them into reality.
And I walked away from them that day, with a heart that truly believed, with a slither of hope inside.
Time passed quickly, day after day waiting for something, for a sign that something good was going to happen and possibly I would make one of the dreams come true. But still there was nothing.
There were days I felt down, and moments when I gave up on trying. But there was still something within me, something was still igniting and lightening my heart like a small candle burning.
It was hope.
Days ago, I finally received the news. My dream has finally come true.
Perchance the dream I had is so important to me that I am unable to share it with the rest of the world. Yet that is not the end of it.
After all the hard times, all the curves and turns, and after the dream turned into reality, my conclusions about this journey have changed. I have learnt a lesson that for me is a lot more significant than the dream itself.
I have learnt that, when a heart truly believes and doesn’t know defeat, hope and merely hope can sometimes help one through the complicated and unfair journey called life.
I went back to the paper, I took it from under the rock and brought it home to where it belongs among my possessions.
Today I can walk again, on the same street, the same person, with my head up and my shoulders back in the confidence. I can look at the old man still there gardening my city; but this time it’s just going to be me, walking with a hopeful heart and with my second dream.
For Kurdistan Tribune